Am I actually getting old?

It's Saturday night - I had sex yesterday with my 2nd favourite FB - I have spent tonight thinking about a woman who I can't (or at least shouldn't) have.

We have been speaking for the last week in a very sexual way - and it makes me so hard it's untrue.

I am wondering if:

a) I am getting old and want what i can't have

b) I am just too horny for my own good

c) both of the above

p.s. I am off to buy a porshe - grow a mullet and buy a new leather jacket.

p.p.s You know who you are you sexy minx - now email me and tell me you want me too or I'll have to spank you :)

I suck

Well I do. At keeping this blog going anyway.

Life is so hectic right now I haven't even had time to do much shagging. :(

I have been keeping up with other people's blogs though even if I haven't been commenting much.

I will be back here posting as often as I can though but to no fixed schedule.

Thanks again for all the emails asking where I went.

oh and Just a London Girl - keep up with the flirting - love it!

Ok this time I really am back

Been so busy at work this month that I have hardly even had time to check my emails.

Thanks to Rachel for emailing me and reminding me that I should be here posting dirty sex stories instead of working :)

And since I'm really busy tonight too i will post anohter 5 things about me that a lot of people don't know.

1. I once had sex with a woman and whilst sucking her nipple looked across and saw.....her nipple. Turned out she had a massive boil on her boob and it was dark and eeeekkkk!

2. I have had sex with only 1 black women and I didn't really dig it.

3. I once slept with a pro who stuck her finger up my arse while wanking me off. Very scary and sexy at the same time.

4. I have had sex in a public phone box. (smelly and nasty)

5. I once ejaculated and it shot over 6 feet.

It's good to be back

For the last 2 weeks I have been practicaly living away from home. She was great. She was married. Her husband was away. She wanted me to fuck her.

Boy, did I fuck her!

And now her husband is home. I won't been seeing her again. It's like she never was.

So why can I still smell her perfume?

I'm still here.

Thanks for all the emails asking where I had gone to. I've been messing around with a married woman for the last 2 weeks or so and been taking advantage of the fact that I only had 2 weeks to get as much sex as I could.

Normal blogging will be back next week when I have recovered.

and another thing

When your FBF says she will set you up on a date with a "good looking friend" - ask for pictures first.

shit shit shit

If you ever get the chance to sleep with someone at work - don't do it.

I did a few months ago and today it turned round and bit me clean on the arse!

no knickers

I was out at lunchtime today for a liquid lunch with some friends. We were in a nice little pub that had a beer garden and as it was nice and sunny we decided to sit outside.

On the table across from us was a very attractive woman and her not attractive at all friend. And by not attractive I do mean she looked like a bulldog chewing a wasp.

Unfortunately the good looking woman had her back to me and I was sat staring right at the minger. Not wanting to look at her face I cast my gaze downward and what did I see? A short skirt. A very short skirt.

Now I should have known what was about to happen but after a couple of pints at lunchtime my mind was a bit fuzzy. I noticed she had her legs quite far apart for a skirt that short and for some reason decided to watch and see what I could see.

Fuck me. She opened her legs so she could cross them and....

It was the return of the dreaded matted pubes. What is it with women and their pubes? Trim them. Shave them. I don't care which but do something with them.

And if you are going to wear a short skirt and n0 knickers please keep it all covered.

It looked like a cross between a taco and a shaggy dog.



I think I need more beer to get the image out of my mind.

another 5 things

It's been such a slow day today and I'm not doing a thing tonight other than watching TV and going to bed early. So here are 5 more things about me:

1. I love watching a woman masturbate. (sexiest thing in the world)
2. I once got thrown out of a pub for having sex in the women's toilets
3. I find almost all types of porn are worth watching. I don't really have a preference for one particular kind.
4. I once got stood up by a woman who was meeting me at a naturists health spa and it turned out she did it on purpose because it was a gay health spa and she thought it was funny. I spent an hour sitting in a hot tub with about 8 very gay men laughing at my akwardness until I gave up waiting and left.
5. I find brunettes more attractive than blondes when I am looking for a girlfriend but blondes more attractive when looking for sex.

strangers in the night

well in the shower really.

There is a woman in my shower and I don't know anything about her other than she squints really hard when she has an orgasm and her lip gloss tastes of grapes.

I love the Internet.

ho ho ho

No, it's not a Christmas post but a full run down of how it went with the pro I booked the other night.

For those that want the basic details here they are:

Good looking - damn sexy - fucked lots - very satisfied.


For those that want a bit more - read on.

I paid for an hour up front. £150 is a lot of cash so she really needed to be worth it, and boy was she.

She was booked for 9pm and arrived at my house at exactly 9pm. I do like people to be punctual. On opening the door I was very happy with what I saw. Just short of 6 feet. Shoulder length blonde hair. Slim without being thin. Classy dresser. Short little black dress and a long overcoat.

I welcomed her in and took her coat. Offered her a drink and we sat and had a glass of wine for a few minutes.

By this time I was so curious as to what she was wearing under the little black number.

We retired to the bedroom where she layed me on the bed and slowly undressed me. Now this was unusual for me, being naked before the woman.

I was already rock hard by now and rather excited. The next thing I know, before she has taken a stitch of clothing off she has a condom out and is putting it on me. Then she lent down and took my entire cock in her mouth. Good thing I had a wank an hour before she got here or it would have been all over.

After a good 5 minute long sucking she moved on top of me and sat on my crotch. It was then that I found out what she was wearing under the dress.

Nothing at all.

She must have been enjoying it too by then because I slipped into her with no problems at all. What followed was a 45 minute session of shagging in about 5 different positions finishing with me cumming over her tits.

Normally this is where I would expect the session to end but as we had got on so well she asked if she could use my shower to clean up and asked me to join her.

No more shagging I'm afraid but a good session of soaping eachother up and washing each other down followed.

She left about 10:20 in the end and I am certainly going to call her again sometime.

All in all it was a fantastic visit. For £150 it's not the sort of thing I will be doing every week but it was a great way to unwind.

ill

no posts tonight - am ill. feels like man flu so I may be dying.

will post tomorrow on how I got on with the pro.

time for a pro

I've got a pro all booked and ready for tonight. Better be worth it for £150.

bored

It's been a boring few days. Haven't been out much. Haven't done much of anything.

And what's worse, I haven't had sex since the weekend.

My right arm, however, now looks like Popeye's. I think subconsciously I am still mentally scared from the hairy monster at the weekend.

I need something/somone new to get me out of this hole.

does anyone have a time machine?

Ever spent a weekend having fun, then when you look at it in the cold, hard light of day you think - "I wish I hadn't done that"?

It's been a busy weekend. I went out last night with FBF for a few drinks that ended up at a club that ended up at someones house that ended up in someones bed that ended up waking up and thinking "nooooooooooooooooooo".

I think I need to lay off the booze for a while. Either that or I need to drink more so I don't remember the things I did.

5 more things

It's been a really slow day and I'm not doing anything (that I know of) tonight so here are 5 more things most people don't know about me.

1. I lost my virginity at 19
2. I used to have major wanking sessions thinking about Daisy Duke
3. I once had sex with 5 different people all in the space of 8 hours
4. I have slept with identical twins (not at the same time unfortunately)
5. I once had a girlfriend that was very into watersports and loved to experiment with it in public places
   

FB FB why have you forsaken me?

I don't know about you but I like to have at least two good fuck buddies available at any one time. If one is busy then the other one should at least sometimes be free.

For the last year or so though I have only had one fuck buddy that I really enjoy spending time with and haven't been bothered to find any more. This has worked out well so far and at least two or three times a month we meet up for a drink and a meal and then a night of fun back at her place (it's a lot bigger than my place with more rooms to do it in).

For the last three weeks though she has been busy and I haven't seen her. Not a problem, although she is really good in bed so I do miss the sex.

She called me today to apologise for not being around much and after a nice chat about mundane stuff she told me she has found a boyfriend. A fucking boyfriend? That's just not on!

She told him about me (and her other male friends that she sometimes sleeps with) and for some mad reason is doesn't want her to sleep with any of us any more. How rude.

So now we can go out and have a drink and a meal and at the end of the night I have to come home and have a wank. You cannot imagine how annoyed I am. She was by far the best FB I have ever had.

fuck it!

horsham

I was looking at the stats for this blog today and it looks like someone has been looking at my blog from Horsham in Sussex.

This is only interesting to me because for one miserable summer I used to live in Horsham.

And I only have one decent sex related story from that whole summer. How sad.

So own up whoever you are - might be that we actually know each other.

knobbly bits make all the difference

All I can say is WOW.

WOW!

Yesterday my new toy arrived (see previous post) and I gave it a good workout last night to see what it could do for me.

Now I like wanking. A lot. But this thing makes it so much better than doing it normally.

First go round I got myself nice and hard and put it on. It's quite fiddly the first time but gets much easier the more you use it. Once it was on I began to wank. Long slow strokes for a while followed by some sort rubbing round the top then back to some long strokes again. Damn this thing was good.

The rubber knobbly bits really rub against your cock and give you a very different sensation to a normal wank. After five or so minutes I wanted to see what it was like when I went at it really fast. Well, lets just say that when I got close to orgasm I didn't bother stopping to prolong it.

Tug Tug tug - whoooooaaaaa. Huge orgasm.

And the best bit was because all the tugging had pulled it off the end of my cock about an inch or so it managed to hold most my load in the end. Less clean up for me. Bonus.

I was tempted to leave it at that for the night but about an hour later I had been on the phone to a friend of mine (damn sexy but would never sleep with me in a million years) and was horny as hell. Time for round 2.

This time I was already hard but decided to try it with a bit of baby oil. Putting it on took a lot less time and all I did was squirt a small amount of baby oil down the end onto the end of my cock.

Instantly the rubber sleave slid effortlessly along my cock. It was like beng wanked off by an angel. The combination of rubber knobbly bits and baby oil was overwhelming. I'd like to say I had a good long wank but I would be a bit fat liar. It lasted no more than 2 minutes. Probably closer to 1 1/2. But fuck me it was good.

You know when you pull on a cock for ages, slowing down and stopping, then starting again and prolonging it for ages. Well the orgasm was like that. The rubber bit kept none of it in this time. I came like I haven't come from wanking in years. It was hard and powerful and fuck me it went far.

So to sum up - men, buy one - women, buy your man one.

You will not regret it.

a new day, a new toy

My new toy arrived today.

After reading about furtive's recent purchases I decided that it had been to long since I had a new toy. Looking for mens toys is much harder than looking for womens. There just isn't the selection if you will be using them alone.

I finally settled on this. I haven't used it yet but the night is young and I'm sure it'll get a try out (or 2) before bed.

twitter me

I have set up a new instant notification thingy.

Head on over to http://twitter.com/sethcavendish, sign up and add me as a friend. God knows if this thing will be useful, fun or what but will be interesting to see what people are doing.

five things

The bloke from the curry house says it'll be at least 30 minutes until my dhansak arrives so in the meantime here are five things most people don't know about me.

1. I once slept with my mate's mum (she had a beard)
   
2. I once slept with my girlfriend's mum (she had no body hair at all!!)
   
3. I had an offer of gay sex once and turned it down (a topic for another time)
   
4. I once had sex 11 times in one day (and walked like John Wayne for the next 2 days)
5. I once accidently got my own semen in my mouth (Just don't ask)

More fun lists later.

Free porn for all

Just found this fantastic site that lets you watch streaming porn - for free.

Go to http://channelchooser.com/adult.php and have a look. Some of the movies take a while to load and some are just short clips but they seem to be updated quite frequently.

I wonder what I will be doing tonight?

A second mobile number is a must.

Crazy woman from yesterday keeps calling me. If I don't answer the phone the fifth time you call and leave a message you should probably get the hint that I am not interested.

This weekend I'll go and get a pay as you go mobile I think. I don't want psycho woman calling my main number all the time.

The next question is, should I call her back and say "go away mental lady" or should I just hope that if I ignore her long enough she will get the hint?

Mad mad and mad again

Just a quick post before I try and rustle up something for dinner.

Don't go on blind dates with people met on the Internet on a Sunday afternoon. If todays experience taught me anything it's that you really need to spend more time getting to know people before you go and meet them.

The woman I met today was all kinds of crazy and not in a good way. Not an adorable crazy where she is a little strange but none the less normal. This woman was proper crazy. I felt like I was having a drink with an escapee from one flew over the cukoo's nest.

Next time - I want at least a photo and a phone call before I meet someone.

baby oil or no baby oil?

Always, always use baby oil. Not using it can cause ripping due to over enthusiastic wanking!

Anyone got some anadin extra?

Is it wrong to judge women that are fat (I mean really fat)?

I am a member of many online dating sites. Some are crap and just send you junk emails - some are actually worth paying for and you get a lot of quality contacts.

Recently, I have been chattng with a woman that found my profile on a dating site and we have been getting on very well. She mentioned when we first started talking that she was a bit on the large size but never mentioned her size as a problem.

Well, things have moved on since then and tonight she asked when I was going to come round and "see her". I, intrigued, asked for a photo.

Well spank my arse and call me Judy - damn she was fat.

Now I have nothing against fat women. I am a lover of all shapes and sizes as long as people aren't obese I normally find them attractive. This women, however, was about 300 pounds and I think at least part of her was deep fried.

I wish it had been different. I wish she was a UK size 20. But she wasn't. She was too fat for me and that's something I have never run into before.

Do women find the same problem with men? Or is it just a man thing?

A new kind of "friend"

A good female friend of mine (fbf) is one of the few people that know everything that goes on in my life. She has, recently, coined a term for the people I visit outside of my normal circle.

She has named them "friends".

These are people that I have either met and am shagging or people that I pay for sex. She thinks that by calling them "friends" (you can hear the speech marks when she says it) that she can talk about them in very public places.

Only last week we were sitting in a bar having a drink when she asked rather loudly if I had made any new "friends" recently.

All I can say is that I think 99% of people listening in would know exactly what kind of "friend" she is talking about. How is that that women can be so subtle in some ways and so obvious in other ways?

I'm back.

It's been a long time since I did any blog posting and I decided to ditch the old domain name and just come back to using good old blogger.

Anyone who knows me or was following my old blog shouldn't have too hard a time finding this new blog.

After almost a year away it feels great to have a new place to write.